


Loving them

by MiniMaffian



Category: Big Bang (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-02
Updated: 2016-05-02
Packaged: 2018-06-05 19:43:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 502
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6719248
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MiniMaffian/pseuds/MiniMaffian
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff"><p>All my works are rough drafts.</p></blockquote>





	Loving them

"Ye, but does it still hurt? "

"What?" Jiyong said, looking up at his friend with a confused smirk.

"Loving them."

Jiyong stared straight forward. It's been a year since it had ended. Seunghyun had left and married a girl. And he had tried so hard to be happy for him because they only had a "thing". But this question, it took him a while to answer that because he didn’t know what to say.  
But then every moment and memory he had that they ever shared together hit him all at once and it felt like someone was choking him as he tried to breathe in air.

Gasping, he finally answered. “Yeah. Fuck, yeah. It still hurts. ”

  
"You need to forget him, Jiyong." His friend told him looking straight at him. "All he did was fuck you up. I know you loved him and maybe you still do but.. He hurt you, Jiyong. You need to move pass this."

A single tear ran down Jiyong cheek. He got up and left his friends house but he knew his friend wouldn't mind. They knew he needed time after Seunghyun had been brought up.

Jiyong thought back to those years. How he and Seunghyun had had that "thing". That thing that happened way too much in every way for a very long time.  
But just over two years ago it all changed. Things caught up with them, things that had happened years and even decades ago. They were both broken people inside, even if they tried to ignore it. And they both knew they weren't good for each other.  
And he knew it hurt Seunghyun and Seunghyun knew it hurt him and neither of them could do a thing about it. They tried to fix each other, all while knowing there was no way they could.

So one night, when they laid with their legs entwined Seunghyun spoke up with that voice,

“I love you, right? God knows I fucking love you. But this isn’t working, is it? We’re breaking each other’s heart and it feels like we’re running on borrowed time.“

And Jiyong said nothing because Seunghyun was right and he hated it. Jiyong laid there silently, hating the way everything messed itself up. He laid there and hated it all.

After that night they said it was over. And it really was.  
Jiyong was heartbroken and he knew Seunghyun were too because no one saw him for weeks.  
Jiyong tried to fuck the heartbreak out of himself but it only made him numb. No one could take him like Seunghyun could, no one could ever love him the way Seunghyun had.

So when he got the "happy news" Jiyong couldn't breath. He had just collapsed on the floor and laid there until his friend came to drop something of to him. He had laid there for 6 hours but it had felt like minutes because he had only had one though in his head.

_"I have lost the love of my life."_

**Author's Note:**

> All my works are rough drafts.


End file.
